to this day, i remember

I remember this day nine years ago. I was on my way back home from a trip. I was trying to run away and hide from a man who made me fall in love, promised a future with him only to break his word, my heart, and my faith. He flew eight thousand five hundred miles to look for me and win me back and mend the broken vows he’s given me. Afraid of the possibility of hurting me all over again I packed my bags, bought ticket and flew south where he can never find me.

Today, nine years ago, I had landed back to Cebu and thought I was on the clear and he has gone back to Indianapolis in his cozy American life. As I waited for the carousel to spit my luggage I looked at the front page of the newspaper the man beside me was holding. I see a picture of a very tall building and from it thick smoke billowed to the sky. Curiously, I scanned the waiting area for a TV and walked up to it mesmerized by a silent TV broadcasting CNN’s news of two planes crash into the World Trade Center Towers.

As horror gripped me and anger filled my heart I came to realize how foolish I was running and hiding from a man who broke my heart. My pain paled in comparison to these people who died without reason, people who trying to save those trapped in the building, and people who’ve died to pursue the war against terror. And so that night as the man I was hiding from sent me an urgent message to have dinner with me, I said yes and chose the best outfit in my wardrobe. Yes he broke my heart, but he didn’t break my spirit. I thought that I am blessed to be alive and learn and continue living and someday I will find that one person who is meant to keep his promises and shape a future with him.

Today, I remember nine years ago. I remember it like it was yesterday. Except I feel no pain or fear. In contrary, I feel elated that what I realized that day is now happening. But the many unnamed faces who’ve we’ve lost tragically I will forever be grateful. If it was not for them, I would not have been a stronger person. And if not for them, I would have not valued my life.