I hardly get offended now. Maybe because I went through a lot of pain. Maybe because of all these pain I’ve become apathetic. Maybe because of all the pain I received and gave I’ve learned to toughen up and grow up. Looking ay myself in my dim mind, I see me in full armor. An armor that protects me from heart quenching pain. A shield I have learned to always hold to secure my sanity (though my trusty Z’s help too).
After all these years, I’ve learned to step back and assess any comment or action which I find offensive. I’ve learned to shut up. And after all these years I still walk away when I find someone’s words towards me too hurtful or too accusing. Yes, one of my best talents is to walk away. And every time I do the person I leave behind always shouts that I am always reliable on that --- walking away. I know they feel frustrated, they’re angry at me, they’re hurt I left them. In my mind I do not care.. or should I say, I DO CARE. I care enough to walk away and not say hurtful things out of spite. I care enough to walk away before I hurt them physically.
There are a few moments when I do stay. And I’ve always regretted staying. Either I cut them up worse than they deserve or I cut them up literally and blood and gore have to be cleaned afterwards. All the hugs and apologies do not erase the fact that I’ve hurt them. And even if I do not wish to, it’s there already.
So bear with me bitch, if I do not speak to you for a few days even if you are just sitting a meter away from me. You’d rather be suffering in silence rather than suffer with all the insecurities I can instill in your mind and heart. But because I know you itch to find out why I would not talk to you, fasten your seatbelt and in case you’d need it I’ll have the EMT waiting outside.
- You are so fucking tactless! God! I can never believe you have the nerve to say that could’ve intimidated C which is why she is failing audits. And because you’re so tactless you repeated the same words even if I bluntly told you that what you said is a crude joke. Hello?!? Maybe you don’t know what “crude” means. Go get yourself a dictionary!
- And don’t you dare accuse my trainee that she is cheating and she should not continue training. Are you not the one who is seeing a married man?!? Seriously, your double standards make me sick. What makes it more sick is you’re seeing a married man who is older than my dad! Fuck bitch, are you running out of men? Weird. When you cavort and flirt with all the guys in the office.
- What’s with the loud laughter every time you walk in? You’re laughter is so fucking irritating, it’s quite tempting to sock your mouth.
- Why do you get jealous every time your duckies ask me out? Hello. It’s a smoke break. If you can’t take it light a cigarette and join us. Don’t tell your duckies not to talk to me! Anyone can talk to anyone and anyone can not talk to anyone. It’s called power of choice. Who are you to stop them?
- I don’t understand why you keep on telling me everyday you want to be demoted. If you really want to be demoted go tell the boss. Or are you not meaning what you say? It’s so obvious you don’t want to be demoted. You just want a bigger pay. If you want a bigger pay, why don’t we just let it out in the open. I get to hear you whine everyday about it it’s driving me nuts! You got issues, I got issues, every one has issues. Stop whining and start working bitch!
- Stop shouting at your duckies! How dare you tell them that the reason you are stuck to the manager position is because of them. As if you do not enjoy the glory. As if you are not enjoying the fact that you don't have quotas. Get a grip of your boobs woman and quit putting it up on their face that you are a manager. FUCK YOU!
-And since you asked for it, stop trying to compete with me. Mr. G told you already... “You can’y compete with D.”
And now that I'm done, exhale.
kape_atbp | August 23, 2008 at 10:54 AM
you should have gone up and said "don't make me slap you!!!" rawr. :)